1. Nicki Minaj will never release another song.
2. I don’t have to go to my dentist appointment on the 28th.
3. We can all skip the formalities of courting people and instead have crazy heroin/PCP orgies.
4. I can go throw eggs and feces at the Governor’s Mansion with no repercussions.
5. All the people who went “The world is not gonna end, do some research you idiot,” will look like total idiots.
6. Nicki Minaj will perish in a lava storm.
7. Christmas won’t have happened yet, but Hanukkah did, I bet you all wish Jesus was born on the 20th instead, right?
8. Most people I know will never turn 21 and will never have to know how shitty bars actually are after two decades of build-up.
9. I can go to 24-Hour Fitness and yell “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING?”
10. I won’t have to write my 12-page work term report